Mulatto Moments

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Life

I have not wrote an original post, or posted on here for a long time. However, tonight I have finally found the time to rant about life. A lot has changed since I last posted, I am a college graduate, I live in Brooklyn, NY and I think I am chasing my dreams. What most people don’t realize is I am more alone than ever. I have thrown myself out of my comfort zone and thus have challenged my ability to socialize, survive and succeed. 

Some days it feels great to be in the big apple, to finally feel like in some small way i’ve actually made it, but then other days the stress of work and maintaing a personal life takes over and I realize that my world is completely morphed. 

For starters, I don’t have any friends. I have a few associates that I know from Richmond, but they are not genuine friends and I knew that when I was in Richmond (I don’t know why I would seek to clutch on them as a means of security in NY). I have also gone through a wide range of emotional obstacles to maintain my relationship with josh and even that rests on a skewed teeter. 

Overall, I am living without certainty and it is terrifying. I don’t know if I can make my rent, I don’t know if I will eat three meals in one day and I don’t know if I will have money for the bar, but for once I am making every decision in my life for myself. I have no friends who I feel obligated to entertain or impress and at the same time I don’t feel an obligation to maintaing a job. I am merely doing what 18,000 dollars worth of debt at VCU couldn’t do. 

I am finding myself. I am an emotional wreck in distress and as mortified and enraged as I am with my circumstances I also couldn’t be anymore excited. I am no longer stuck. I finally have the mobility to be free and despite my hardships, I AM LIVING on MY TERMS and I couldn’t be anymore proud of myself. 

"What do I know about sex? Did I want to have it? Or did I feel as though I had to? Why did I want to? When did I feel ready? Am I any good at it? Why did it sometimes make me feel empty? Or excited? Alone? Drained? Terrified? In love? Alive? When was the right time? Would two drinks make it easier? Or four? Did I do something wrong? Put it where? Should I leave now? Where is my bra?"

- Megan Baldwin 

The secret to life is that all we are is the result of what we have thought. Be grateful, take time to appreciate and you will feel great about the life you live. 

Josh and me <3

Angela Strassheim - Evidence

Evidence is a group of photographs taken at homes where familial homicides have occurred. Long after the struggles have ended in these spaces, despite the cleaning, repainting and subsequent re-habitation of these homes, the “Blue Star” solution activates the physical memory of blood through its contact with the remaining DNA proteins on the walls. The black and white images are long exposures – from ten minutes to one hour – with minimal ambient night light pouring in from the crevices of windows and doors, capturing the physical presence of blood as a lurid glow.

(Source: arpeggia, via stronger-wind-stronger-trees-de)

Cheers to all my ladies that will forever be young and wild at heart, please drink a beer for me tonight. 

My older brother Torrey wrote this poem for me:

<3

"The most beautiful clothes that can dress a woman are the arms of the man she loves. But for those who haven’t had the fortune of finding this happiness, I am there."

- Yves Saint Laurent

I&#8217;m trying everyday&#8230;
Self explanatory

The Smiths - Asleep

“Don’t feel bad for me. I want you to know deep in the cell of my heart  I will feel so glad to go.”

(Source: ugh, via mosshut-deactivated20130304)

I am overwhelmed by the routine quality of life. It is so painfully mundane, I can no longer separate the days by the weeks. I’m losing my mind trying to conform to the structure of “adulthood.” So, I anxiously fight the clock, hoping to find peace of mind, but I fear that the only way to accomplish this is by running away from all my responsibilities. 


“A young woman was restrained, force-fed and injected with cosmetics in a high street shop window as part of a hard-hitting protest against animal testing.
Jacqueline Traide was tortured in front of hundreds of horrified shoppers in a bid to raise awareness and end the practise.
The 24-year-old endured 10 hours of experiments, which included having her hair shaved and irritants squirted in her eyes, as part of a worldwide campaign by Lush Cosmetics and The Humane Society.
The disturbing stunt took place in Lush’s Regent Street store, one of the UK’s busiest shopping streets.
Jacqueline appeared genuinely terrified as she was pinned down on a bench and had her mouth stretched open with two metal hooks while a man in a white coat force-fed her until she choked and gagged.
The artist was also injected with numerous needles, had her skin braised and lotions and creams smeared across her face.
Passers-by were gobsmacked to see Jacqueline, a social sculpture student at Oxford Brookes University, forced to have a section of her head shaved.
The gruesome spectacle aimed to highlight the cruelty inflicted on animals during cosmetic laboratory tests and raise awareness that animal testing is still a common practise.
The Humane Society International and Lush Cosmetics have joined forces to launch the largest-ever global campaign to end animal testing for cosmetics.
The campaign, launched to coincide with World Week for Animals in Laboratories, is being rolled out simultaneously in over 700 Lush Ltd shops across forty-seven countries including the United States, Canada, India, Australia, New Zealand, South Korea and Russia.
Lush campaign manager Tamsin Omond said: “The ironic thing is that if it was a beagle in the window and we were doing all these things to it, we’d have the police and RSPCA here in minutes.
“But somewhere in the world, this kind of thing is happening to an animal every few seconds on average.
“The difference is, it’s normally hidden. We need to remind people it is still going on.”
For more information about the campaign, visit www.fightinganimaltesting.com”
Time for the annual stressed out, over caffeinated picture post. Cheers to senior year.